Let me ask you something…
Have you ever just looked at someone and thought how can one person be so positive with all the negative things that has happened to them ?
For me this turned into reality when my mom told me a couple of years ago that when she was younger she battled with anorexia. I couldn’t believe what she had told me, I mean for a girl to hit that point in her life, there must be a reason.Guys if you don’t know this by now, than let be enlighten you with some wisdom of the female gender, us women feel the need to be perfect at all time.
With that said whenever we hear we are fat, to skinny, to ugly, to tomboy or even to girly, best believe we are going to make sure to change ourselves. Let me just add this mostly happen with teen girls who is still finding their way and finding themselves.
Then, my second reality hit just a couple of months ago when one of my best friends told me that she used to be addicted to dieting pills. It just got me thinking, why do we do this, why do we as women fall into this trap ? Well I got the answer and I’m going to tell you 2 stories. (Please note everyone has their own reasons why they do this, but this is to stories close to me.)
Let me tell you a story about my mom.
(Hello mom and daughter look alike photo)
My mom has always been my role model, so the day she told me that she suffered from anorexia it brought tears to my eyes, but at the same time a lot of questions.
What happened ?
How old where you ?
*From a small age my mom taught me that no matter what anyone tells you, you are beautiful. She always said never change yourself for a man. For me this was very confusing, because why is she imprinting these lessons into me at such a young age*
My mom answered all of my questions very honestly (which I loved since that is how our relationship is.) She told me that she was 19 years old when she was diagnosed with anorexia. She also said as for the “why”, she wanted to please her boyfriend at that time. Then with that said she answered my next question “what happened?”. She told me that her boyfriend at that time was emotionally breaking her down, he would make rude comments about her weight, and so she just ate less and less to the point where she was 43 Kg.
I know what most of you are thinking “43 Kg that’s not anorexia”, but it is, actually for her age at that time and her height she was suppose to weigh between 50-56 kg.
This just made me realize that we as women often tend to do “stupid” things to impress a man, and even though at that time it doesn’t seem like a “stupid” idea in the long run it is.
Let me tell you a story about my friend Sarlah
Let me start by saying I only know Sarlah for a year now, and I’m truly blessed to have her as a best friend, so imagine my shock when she told me that she use to be addicted to dieting pills.
My fist reaction was WHAT but WHY ? as always cause you know i’m curious and all that stuff. My heart immediately broke when she told me this, because here I am looking at my best friend and she is such a beautiful women inside and out that I couldn’t understand why.
She told me that at the age of 16 she started with dieting pills and she just got addicted to it. Personally for me I was still in the “WHAT but WHY ” phase, and she said that it was because of bulling that she started with the dieting pills. I immediately understood why she the person who she is today, yes some days she still gets her days where eating isn’t her priority especially when she is stressed, but that what makes our friendship real because I will tell her to eat and she will do the same.
Yesterday I got a whatsapp message from Sarlah late at night telling me that – quote “Tonight I saw one of my school addictions again.” I immediately asked her what it was and she replied with dieting pills. My goodness my heart dropped, because she told me that was one of her addictions, I immediately told her to throw it away. At first I couldn’t understand WHY she would have that at her house, but she herself didn’t even know.
Let me tell this crazy story, she herself is a blogger so she has a book that she writes in, that book went missing. She then obviously started searching for it, but instead of founding her book she found the pills. We believe that this was Gods plan, for her to relive that part of her life again so that she can inspire others.
My main goal with this blog post is to help young girls, to realize that you don’t need to be a size 2 to look beautiful, because you are beautiful just the way you are (Bruno Mars Lyrics right there).
You all know I’m against bulling, and this is just prove to show that no matter what anyone says about you or to you, you can become a better person.
Don’t let other peoples words discourage you, don’t fall into the trap of what beauty really is, YOU are your own kind of BEAUTY !!